earringsDear Jamie of 2006,

You can’t believe that you are actually having a conversation with your husband about him getting earrings.  You HATE earrings on guys.  HATE.  And now the man you love is telling you that he’s getting them.

You tell him how much you hate them.  You tell him that you will not like them.  You tell him that you have always hated earrings on guys.  Always.  Hated.

Here’s the dilemma though.  You have always said that you would not be a wife that tells her husband what he can and can not do.  You don’t want your relationship to be that way.  You want both of you to love and respect each other enough that it doesn’t have to go there.

But now what do you do?  You truly hate earrings and want to tell him that he can not get them.  That you demand he NOT do it.

You can’t do that though.  It’s not who you are or how you want this marriage to run.  So, you come up with a compromise.   You tell Aaron that you are fine with him doing that if he makes you a promise.  The promise is that if you still hate them after 3 months that he’ll take them out.  You care about his feelings, so you don’t want to tell him no, and he cares about your feelings so much that if you don’t like them he’ll take them out.

I want to commend you because this was one of your shining moments as a wife.  You did not want him to get them, but more than that you did not want to tell him that he couldn’t.

Your plan worked.  Well, kinda.  Aaron got the earring and I can’t say you grew to love them, but you grew to not even notice them.  It wasn’t as big of a deal as you thought it was.  In fact if you are truly honest, you kinda liked them.

Now years later he doesn’t have earrings anymore, only because he lost one and has never gotten them done again, although there’s always talk of getting them back.

Great job on not being a demanding wife, and finding a great way to compromise with your man!

Love,

Jamie in 2013

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