Yesterday I had a conversation with one of my boys that I’m sure is the beginning of many more to come.  He was a little timid in talking with me about it, but he had already talked to Aaron about it and I think he just wanted to get it off his chest.  He finally told me.

He likes a girl.

Oh my heart skipped a few beats because I’m not ready for this at all.  He has said this to me before, but it was pretty flippant and this time seemed more sincere.  I want to live in that world where my boys only love me and then around 25 they find a girl they love, they date and then get married.  Easy.  No one ever gets their heart broken.  No one ever does anything stupid.  I want my kids to have it easy with love.

As he began to talk to me, I was in such a hurry because we had friends coming over, but I stopped everything and just listened.  He is smitten over a girl and it is so cute.  I asked him what it makes him feel like when he thinks of her, and his answer has still blown me away.  He said when he thinks of her it makes him want to sing.  To sing.  My boy is a romantic.

I had to fight all that was in me to not look him straight in the eyes and tell him that this is silly.  You are way to young.  You don’t even know what it feels like to truly like someone.  Go to bed and stop talking about this nonsense.

But I didn’t, and I won’t ever belittle my kids feelings for someone else.  I need to remember my days of thinking I was in love with the man of my dreams in 3rd grade and 9th grade.  In my 9 year old heart it wasn’t love, but it was a feeling I had never experienced.  Instead of ignoring his words to me, I want to be there to listen and to guide him.  I want to be able to speak wisdom into his little heart.  For the love he’s begging for it and he doesn’t even know it.  He’s talking to me about a girl that he has a crush on.  I won’t take that for granted or take it lightly.

At the very end he told me that he has written her a poem and was going to give it to her anonymously tomorrow.  I took the poem so that I could show Aaron and also take a picture of it, because I need to document this because it is just too precious.  I told Aaron I was s little apprehensive about letting him give it to her, because what if it freaked her parents out, or the teacher was upset.  We decided that we need to let him because it’s harmless and he’s expressing feelings for someone.   In a very romantic way I might add.  My boy has a way with his words.  He’s gonna be a charmer I think.

So, today I wait for him to get out of school and pray to God that I don’t pick him up and he’s devastated because someone made fun of him, or she knows it’s him and tells everyone, or some friends find out and pick on him.  Oh I want my baby’s heart to be protected.  I guess this is the part of parenting that I hate.  Sitting back and watching your kids live.

poem

 

{Update … he didn’t get to give it to her, but he’s thinking about giving it to her next week.  Also please don’t mention this to him if you read this and know him.  I was hesitant about blogging about it, but for the love when he’s 25 I need this memory for him.  It’s just too precious.  And I need to be able to show him his first love poem. }

 

This entry is a part of #7in7.  For more writers that are doing this, visit Fab’s blog.

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